I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We have started to decorate penises.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize