Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
not ubering you a puppy
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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