Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
