More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
smell my finger.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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