Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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