i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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