The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
