My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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