I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
