I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
