ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
