Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
