Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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