you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
