did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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