girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
