ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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