I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
