David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
