Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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