why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
