I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize