i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We talked him into tasing himself.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
There are leaves in my underwear?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize