I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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