Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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