What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
