This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
