Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
