Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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