I don't think brook has ever known best
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I stole a fireplace last night.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
