Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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