He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
