Three words: puerto rican gang bang
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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