I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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