i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
My life is pants optional.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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