At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize