For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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