hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Randomize
