he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
