do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
