its not stalking. its research.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
