I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
