he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I will be naked everywhere
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize