Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I think your dad took our porno
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
