i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
