So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
