Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
All the doctor said was why
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
