lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
