I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
