return my video game
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
You were trust falling into bushes
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
