I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Be still, my beating vagina.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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