Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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